Saturday, September 29, 2007

Saturday 12th December 1936

Weekend at Ealing. As I entered the flat I heard The National Anthem, (on radio) followed by a salute of forty one guns fired in Hyde Park. Salute to King George the Sixth! An emotional, impulsive, brilliant and erratic King has gone. A quiet, reserved, staid and reliable King has taken his place. Now the sensation of the year is over.

Met Anne in the evening for what was to be our last outing. We had exchanged letters on the subject already. Went to the pictures – a typical, conventional affair. I put my arm round her as we sat in the balcony and she snuggled her head on my shoulder.

Had never “made love” in the Pictures in this suburban way. Wanted to do it once, for the experience! Quite nice – amusing too when the lights suddenly went up for the interval, revealing us! Well, I must be getting blasé. We did not mention the subject of parting until we arrived at Anne’s porch; midnight. Then we had to stroll around again, discussing the matter. I told a white lie about there being no one else. To be quite frank, I wished it was not our last night! Especially when we discussed the expeditions of the last few months. Neglected opportunities, due to my obstinacy and her gaucherie! Dammit though! Vacillation is senseless.

I kissed her twice, very correctly; she is charming to kiss. Kisses in a porch, two yards from the open street. Well, I love contrast. It has been ripping to know an ordinary, normal girl. But – must I again remind myself?

“Four things come not back to man or woman. The sped arrow; the spoken word; the past life; the neglected opportunity”

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